Everything that could annoy you, printed before you pay.
The rental industry's oldest habit is putting the real conditions where you will only find them afterwards. All of ours are here, in the order they are likely to matter.
Not everybody, and we would rather say so here.
If any of these rules them out for you, please do not book and then argue at the counter — we will not bend them, and we would rather you found out now.
28 or over for anything, 30 or over for the Daytona.
Higher than the usual 25 because our insurer sets it there, and higher again for the winged car because of what it is worth. This is not negotiable and no deposit will change it.
A license held five years, and clean for three.
Any full license, any country, but we run a check and we will ask to see the original at handover. A photograph of it is not enough. Two or fewer points is fine; a disqualification inside five years is not.
The Mustang and the Chevelle need you to be able to drive one.
Not certified, not tested — just honest. If it has been fifteen years, take the GTO instead: it is the same experience with an automatic, and a burnt clutch on a fifty-year-old car is a four-week repair, not an afternoon.
The Daytona only goes to people who have rented from us before.
The one genuine exclusion on the list. The wing changes how the back of the car behaves and the nose changes how it turns in, and we want to have watched you drive something else first. Take the Chevelle, come back, take the Daytona.
No passenger under eight, in any car, ever.
Lap belts only and no anchor points anywhere in the fleet. We will not fit an aftermarket anchor into a structure that was not designed for one, and we will not pretend it is a judgment call.
Included, and not included, on one page.
Something will eventually go wrong. That is what old cars do.
In eleven years we have had cars stop for a fuel pump, a coil, a hose and — once — a wheel bearing. Not one of those was the renter's fault and not one of them cost the renter anything.
If it stops: pull over, call us, and do not attempt to fix it.
Our number is on the key fob and on a card in the glovebox. We will come out. If it cannot be restarted at the roadside we bring you back and you are not charged for the day, or for any part of it you did not get to drive.
If it overheats: heater to full, windows open.
It looks mad and it works — the heater core is a second radiator. If the needle keeps climbing, pull over and switch off. An engine that overheats and is stopped is a bad afternoon; one that is driven on is a rebuilt engine.
On damage: stone chips and kerbed wheels are ours, panels are yours.
We expect chips, minor scuffs and the occasional kerbed rim, and we do not charge for them — that is the cost of cars being driven and it is priced into the rate. Bodywork, glass and mechanical damage from misuse come out of the deposit, and we show you the repair invoice.
If you are late, an hour is free; after that it is a half day.
Call and tell us; there is usually another booking behind you and we can move it if we know. The charge is for the disruption, not a penalty, and if the car is not booked out again we will not apply it.
Canceling: full refund to seven days, half inside seven, nothing inside 48 hours.
Except for weather — if the forecast is bad enough that we would not take the car out ourselves, we will call you and move it for free, however late it is. That call comes from us.
Still want one?
Good. Everything above is the worst of it, and we have now told you all of it. The rest is just a very good day.